t-day type #8

I wanna believe in Love.

It just does not work

For me.

Do I try too hard?

Do I not try enough?

I do not know.

I will never know.

I've seen it,

My grandparents were together for

60 years.

That is more than

Two of my own life times

(So far).

Am I unlucky?

Am I unworthy?

Are they the same thing

From different perspectives?

I have had

Close encounters.

Like a brush with

Alien life,

The memories are hazy.

Some days

They are great

On others

They are nightmares.

Time heals all wounds

But it also erases

Memories not worth having.

It seems that

Fate,

Or the universe,

Does not want me to be happy.

But I am not sure

If I even believe in that.

Some days

I am not even sure

That I believe in anything.

Some days,

I do not believe

In myself.

Or anything

For that matter.

I think this is a

Universal feeling.

That everyone

Has experienced,

But we don't

Talk about it.

We don't want to

Talk about it.

The Instagramification

Of the world

Wants us to focus

Only on the positive.

On the fun.

On the vibes.

It's not real.

None of it is real.

It's getting dressed up

To take a selfie

Then stay home.

It's a lie

Covered with a filter,

With an unrelated caption.

Like a picture of

Colorful candy;

On top of a

Depressed blog post.